Greetings, squadlings.

If you’re wondering why I haven’t posted recently, it’s because on Wednesday, I had my wisdom teeth removed. All four of them. LITERAL HELL.

I knew the recovery was going to be rough, but I didn’t expect it to be as bad as it was. Right after I woke up from the surgery, of course, I felt nothing, but I did end up crying over mashed potatoes. Don’t do drugs, kids.

Loads of painkillers, lots of sleep, and one season of Friends on Netflix later, and it’s Saturday. I’m still swollen and in pain, although the pain isn’t unbearable anymore. I’ve also become a master at talking with my mouth closed, because I still can’t open my mouth without excruciating pain. To give you an idea of what I look like, it’s something like this:

Beautiful.

Aside from being a human chipmunk, I’ve basically just been sleeping all break, considering I can’t go to work looking like this.

The viral video of my dad, which you can read about here, peaked at about four million views before it died down. Thank god that’s over.

My sister is in Italy for Spring Break, and should be heading to Greece soon. She promised she’d bring me a bobblehead of the Pope. We’ll see.

Other than that, I’m pretty much just basking in my own misery.

I start school again on Tuesday. Pray for me.

Until we meet again, squadlings.